This Must Be The Place

You know, I've had a scattered lot of music references I've been wanting to write about. I have not been listening to any Talking Heads, but what the hey, let's dedicate a little press to the Talking Heads.

"This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody)" is one of those brilliant moments where the song's anxious, cynical narrator discovers a sense of hope. David Byrne has admitted that this is totally a love song, mind you in the Stop Making Sense concert, he sings it to a lamp. A freaking lamp.

Anyways. the song talks a lot about "home." 

"Home is where I want to be, but I guess I'm already there... I guess that this must be the place." 

I GUESS. Because David Byrne couldn't possibly write a comforting love song without expressing some casual sense of unsurety. At the end of the day, neither could I.

I didn't do a lot today. Mostly ran errands. I  bumped into a bunch of people I knew. I went to the temple. I went for a run. I later found myself taking the long way home; driving around the neighborhood at night in my heated car with some Superchunk cranked up (the band name speaks for itself). I had a heartwarming moment to myself. Kind of a light bulb moment. 

It was kinda like... 

[My voice suddenly develops a dream-like reverberating quality as spacey/bloopy sounds segue into the "stream-of-conscience" segment of this blog. It's earlier tonight, I'm driving around, Superchunk cranked up.] 

This is it. This must be what people talk about when they talk about doing something they love. Or being in love. This sense of familiarity and excitement. Even the temperature just feels so correct.

People say there's no greater joy than starting your own family. Perhaps I just so rarely allow myself to experiment the joys of life beyond stuff like this, I've just never even considered it. This place where I am right now, perhaps it's my home. This is where I reside; mentally, emotionally. If I could change anything about this, I'd just add some friends. But that's all. I'm cool with company. 

I'm not sure what people are talking about when they talk about confident relationships or whatever, but it can't be too different from this. Dear God, if I ever get married, please send me someone who'll drive around with me and listen to Superchunk at maximum volume. Amen.

[Spacey/bloopy sounds returns. We are no longer in the car, but back to normal blog world.]

...Kinda like that. 

So I realize that some of my thoughts written above are flat-out ridiculous. And maybe the "Dear God" sentence is unrealistic wishful thinking. I realize all this. Now here are some things you all ought to realize:

I usually like where I live. I don't always like what I'm doing. I don't always like myself. But for a moment, I liked all of the above. Heck, for most of today I liked all 3 of these things. This is rare territory for me. If you can enjoy yourself, who you're with, where you are, what you're doing, even the purpose behind it all... you're there, man. You're home. At the LDS temple, at the Smith's grocery store on 400 N, running down Canyon Rd, playing guitar, it all counts. 

But I ought to wrap this up. As that Talking Heads song suggests, "The less we say about it, the better."

I GUESS I found some of pieces of my home today. I should go home more often. 

My Theatre Production Experiences (ranked)

So, I'm not gonna give a big intro about my awkward relationship with the theatre world, but here's a list of every show I was part of in my adulthood.
So, like, every show since I turned 18.
So this includes my acting days of junior college + senior year of high school, as well as my stage crew + management days at Utah State University.
So, these are ranked based on my personal experience. There are 14 shows on the list. If the show is ranked low, it's not because the cast + crew were garbage; I was probably just going through a rough time. Also, a low ranking is not necessarily due to a low quality performance or production (the Tennessee Williams show would be ranked much higher); I was probably just going through a hard time.
So here we go.

14: Ah, Wilderness! (Assistant Stage Manger, USU, 2014)
These were some of the worst days of my life. I remember being stressed all the time, never knowing what to do, walking to-and-from rehearsal in the cold, having $12 in my bank account, owning a TracFone, going hungry daily, thinking I had no friends, deeply considering running away from life... Just gotta let this out there. It was a bad time.

13: Collective Dating (Light Board Op, CSI, 2012)
I have successfully taught myself to entirely forget about this experience.

12: Cat On A Hot Tin Roof (Props Master, USU, 2015)
This is ranked super low, but not because of the production itself. It's not because of USU. It's not because I was going through a hard time. It's because I discovered the joys of being a props master. Dear God. I would have never made it without Trevor Flocco or Shawn Fisher. Those guys did tons for me. It's a miracle the show looked great, and on time. Well, I mean, kinda on time...

11: Othello (Actor, CSI, 2009)
You know, for a 3-hour show, the results were not too gratifying. There was some bad blood going on backstage. It was just kind of an eerie time for all of us.

10: Bus Stop (Light Board Op, USU, 2014)
Don't remember much about this other than everyone singing Anne Murray's "Make Love To Me" + Perry Como's "Mama Loves Mambo" over the headset. Good times.

9: The Murder Room (Actor, CSI, 2009)
This was a pretty funny show. This was a pretty fun show to work on. I even did a good job, at least according to Tony "Uncle Tony" Mannen. It was just kind of a generalized experienced. That is, in comparison to Tarzan.

8: Tarzan (Fly Crew, USU, 2014)
This show was extremely stressful to work on. And thus it was unforgettable. It was a unique experience in its own right. I feel like all the cast + crew who took part in it should have shirts that read "I SURVIVED TARZAN." I guess I had the easiest job of anyone in the fly crew, but dang, pushing a button that launches people 50 feet into the air? As Jack White would say, it's "The Hardest Button To Button."

7: Reasons To Be Pretty (Stage Manager, USU, 2016)
Fun Fact: Dating someone while stage managing a show is to not date them at all. At least not on weekdays. But yeah, this was the first show I stage managed and it turned out totally fine. 4 actors. 4 degrees outside. 4 weeks to prepare. Bring it on.

6: A Christmas Carol (Actor, JHS, 2008)
Ladies and gentlemen, I may be the only guy you know who played Ebeneezer Scrooge with braces on his teeth. Of course it was super fun, I could rank this higher. I just remember in this point of my young adult life... well, I think I was type-casted.

5: Sondheim On Sondheim (Assistant Stage Manager, USU, 2015)
This show had +/- 100 musical numbers in it, but all the songs were beautiful and all our singers were amazing. God bless America. When an ASM is just sitting side-stage with nothing to do but listen to some gorgeous live music, it's quite refreshing.

4: The Matchmaker (Stage Manager, USU, 2016)
I'm sure anyone who was on headset with me for the final minutes of this show can recall my explosively vulgar rant when the sound was screwing up. But other than that, I felt pretty chill. I felt like I could get along with the people I worked with. And watching this show come together was rather magical. Everyone seemed on-board with each other. Cherry on top: It was a darn funny show.

3: Dogfight (Assistant Stage Manager, USU, 2016)
Ha! Freaking Dogfight. This was just a super fun semester for me, so I definitely see this show through a rose-colored glass. That's all I got.

2: Guys & Dolls (Actor, JHS, 2009)
I can't recall whether or not I did a good job in this show. But the rehearsals were the freaking best. That cast was gold. I was on the verge of high school graduation, I got my braces off, I was a state champion in Advanced Speech. Everything was coming up Scott E Hall. Age 18, baby.

1: The Laramie Project (Actor, RAT, 2009)
Both my experiences doing The Laramie Project with Random Acts of Theatre (probably still southern Idaho's only underground theatre troupe) were amazing. Amazing show; amazing lessons learned. I particularly remember our January 2009 performance where I got to play a few more characters and had to balance rehearsals with my school work. We were low on time and had to depend on each other. The results were worth it. Glad to help present a story like this to a surprisingly full audience. I might have cried.