Saturday, September 20, 2014

girl complexes II

I actually don't think I've ever written a blogpost about girls. At least not yet. I tried writing one about everyday sexism that people don't recognize (but that definitely turned into a rant and I had to stop). I write lyrics on one of my other blogs. Some of those are about girls (or at least kinda). A blog titled "girl complexes I" is a saved draft. This blog leans toward my theories on underlying sexism, only this is written after 3 months of 0 dates.
Somewhere between the beginning and end of summer, I went from thoroughly enjoying talking about relationships to absolutely abhorring it. I used to psychoanalyze everything and now I realize there's not much to analyze between a guy and a gal. It's pretty darn simple: You either like each other or ya don't. I guess going in depth about infatuation can be pretty fun. It can also be an unneeded stressor.
I still remember Brother Kirkham's summer challenge to put yourself out there, even if it means getting your heart broken. (The Sandlot principle: "Get into trouble, for crying out loud!") I obviously didn't do this, but I still think it's great advice. Toward the end of the summer I started getting these aggravating tension headaches. My doctor gave me a blood test and said the bilirubin in my bloodstream was "elevated enough to make a difference." I've been on drugs the past few weeks and the headaches are gone! I feel great! But I still don't wanna talk about dating. Today I wanna talk about something else.
~It's said that one of the main defects of pornography is that its used as a way to view people as objects. However, pornography is NOT the only way to view people as objects. When you think of the opposite sex as a pool of people in which you have to pick a spouse, you are thinking of them as objects.
~There is such a thing as glorifying a sex, be it your own or the opposite. It's astoundingly stupid how many guys who say "all women are perfect" are the same guys who think males are naturally in charge of the freaking universe.
~Consider a term Duke Ellington used to define people he admired: "Beyond category." When referring to girls collectively as "girls" outside of a broad sense, some guys tend to forget that girls are individuals too. I'm referring to compartmentalization. It's like some guys have a checklist of inherently good v bad qualities not only in a wife, but in a human being. Lookin' for "The One" is one thing, I guess. Thinking of a person's unique qualities as something inferior? Unacceptable. It's like we have expectations out there for every member of the opposite sex. Preposterous!
~Speaking of expectations, how could someone possibly expect more from another person than what they can do themselves? Yes, this is the same thing as hypocrisy.
~The Kung Fu Panda principle: "There is no secret recipe." I've heard too many guys gripe about how Mr. So-and-So just gets all the girls. #1: No griping aloud when you're around me. #2: If you want girls so bad, why are you so focused on this dude? #3: You're obviously doing something wrong. Should you be more like the girl-magnet guy? Maybe, maybe not. I'm not sure what you're missing. But you're obviously doing something wrong. Because you seem unhappy. There's no secret recipe to getting a good ol' gf. But if you're a happy person, you're happy with or without one.
~I believe that all girls are people. I believe that all people are powerful.
~I don't know when I'll get back into dating. But the idea seems more appealing to me this weekend than it did last weekend. What can I say? I'm attracted to them.
Furthermore, girls out there need to understand that not all guys are jerks... although a large chunk of us are... at least subconsciously.

(look out for a pt III to the girl complexes series... i think the whole thing will be on attractiveness)